Spring Morning

The air is heavy with moisture; a sweet, sticky spring morning with a promise of rain.
A light southern breeze off the gulf brings moist cool air to my back,
I can hear the tobacco igniting as I inhale the toxic smoke from my Sky Dancer.
There's an air-conditioner humming in the distance. The grackle is ca caing at a small sparrow.
Mocking birds are fighting over a branch somewhere in the Junipers.
I hang my head as I exhale the smoke, looking at the monkey grass, I expect it to grow as I watch it.
I can see pill-bugs, marching across the mulch towards a minuscule mushroom, expecting to find food.
A small beetle skitters in front of my feet, almost expecting my to crunch his hard, green, shimmery shell.
My last puff, exhaling I smile,
I have found peace, among the hustle and bustle of this fast paced, dog-eat-dog world I have found it.

It's moments like these that I long for.

I separate what's left of the cherry from the butt(old habits die hard) and flick it over the railing.
Sleep will come easy this morning.

Oakleys and Assault Packs

In my time in the Army I learned two very important things:

1-The Army issues crappy gear because it's cheap and mass produced
2-Pack light, freeze at night

These things were taught to me by very wise older brother figures who I still consider some of my best friends. The first thing I ever did was replace the crappy ESS safety glasses with some slick looking M-Frame Oakleys. The normal lens you'd see looked similar to the ESS lens. (Very blocky and square) The alternative was a bad ass "swoop" style lens, I bought this one. In any branch of the military there are very few things that you can wear all the time that set you apart, I mean let's face it, appearance is everything in the service. Your tattoos and shades were just a couple of the items on the short list of items you could customize. As The Usual Suspect said in his blog, you miss the things you did when you were in.

The next major purchase I made was an Assault pack made by Blackhawk. An OD Green, 3-day Assault pack. I could make everything fit and it was comfortable to wear. I loved it so much I never used another issued assault pack. I carried it through both deployments and still carry my books in it today.

I left the Army in February of last year, I left with my Assault pack on my seat sporting my Oakley Half Jacket XLJ's. Every time I go outside I sport them. I've noticed that where I live the Half Jackets are very popular. I also realized that I look almost like every other tool that wears them. Except for one thing...

My Oakleys have seen things that most men could not and don't imagine. They've seen the most beautiful sunsets imaginable in a country full of people that care only to live their lives. They've seen children playing with wire, tires and other odd toys with no desire for anything other than happiness. They've also seen people in trouble, friends who have been changed, never to return home the same. Power plays, minor miracles, and major tragedies. My Oakleys have seen the the worst in the world and watched the good become better. My Oakleys have seen it all...most importantly I have seen it all. For this reason I know I'm not just another tool concerned with the newest toys, the coolest cars, the hottest girls or the latest drugs.

I will continue to sport my shades when the sun is out, while carrying my OD Green assault pack as a book bag. I will continue to defend my service as honorable. I will continue to march on with my life; one step at a time, because sometimes that's all I can handle.

Rice and Gunfire

A couple hours ago I was eating a pizza I shouldn't have bought, with the money I really don't have to spare, in my room while watching the television. 315 channels of included cable and not a damn thing on. CNN popped on and to my dismay two young Haitian (spelling?) men have been shot for "stealing" bags of rice. None of the locals in the area think the rice was stolen, and disagree with them being shot.

Side note:
I am truly dismayed and wish I could be down in Haiti with Team Rubicon but don't have the means(not sure how that would work out with the GI Bill either).

I immediately became infuriated as I watched a young man die. CNN Reporter Karl Penhaul and his camera man (whose name I don't know) film this man dying in the middle of the street. I understand we aren't supposed to interfere with police business, but THE POLICE HAVE LEFT THE SCENE!!

What the hell?!??!

What irks me even more is that there are obviously other foreigners standing around that do nothing. I understand that TV is not a good place to learn your first aid techniques but come on, one of the basic things you CAN learn from TV shows is attempt to stop the bleeding. The very least you could do as a fucking human being is hold his fucking hand as you watch him suffocate on the blood pooling in his lungs!!!

Sorry, I really don't know who to hate, the media or society for choosing to allow the media to broadcast a/an horrific event such as that. Who do I have to petition to get such things stopped?

Go to CNN's website and look under their videos section, the international tab, "Haiti Summary Execution" if you must watch it.

What is our world coming too?

VA, School and Life as it is

Got a call from the VA on Sunday, said they tried to reach me all weekend. Hmmm, weird, no missed calls...oh that's right I don't usually answer calls from "Unknown". Just something I picked up to avoid talking to people who want me to buy their newest penis enlargement pills, insurance on my 1967 Mustang (that I don't have) or take a survey about my water company (they provide me water at a decent price, what's to complain about). He says the same things to me that he says to 13 Stoploss. Gotta love the VA. Just think the President is the one who picked the guy that picked the Secretary in charge of the VA. Says something about our leadership up there. Someone doesn't give 2 shits about the Vets. Enough about that.

I just got my Rogerian Argument paper back. Made a 91 on it. Not to bad for work that I did in a few hours and hating every minute of it. I'm pretty sure I aced my Govt exam, and I'm still breezing through my [Woman's] History class. I still have no idea what I would like to study while I'm here. I've thought about it and I just want to be a Cowboy. Riding a horse, chasing down cattle rustlers, nice ranch in the middle of nowhere...I want to do it 135yrs ago though. I'll figure something out.

Life is good, other than missing the camaraderie and brotherhood I had with the guys I served with. Yes I have friends that I hang out with now, but it isn't the same. I sort of miss Iraq and all the fun we had together over there. (Well if that doesn't sound gay I don't know what does.) I had a blast with the friends I made over there in that man-made hell. As shitty as life was for everyone we kicked ass and took names. Nowhere else will I find that "Brotherhood" that I miss. Life doesn't have that same thrill or zeal that it used to have.

I'm tired of punk-ass college kids complaining about how there daddy is about to cut them off if they don't shape up. I'm tired of the assholes in Washington playing with my life as if I were just a number. I can't yell loud enough to make anyone in a position to do anything hear me...without resorting to illegal actions that is. I just want to be a regular person and live a normal life without all the pent up rage and hatred. Without all the stress to perform to a certain standard. Damn if this shit don't feel like a f*ing joke.

GOOOH!!

It stands for Get out of our house!! A website designed to help potential politicians have a chance at getting elected to office. Check it out, join and tell your friends to join.

Congressman Bird

One thing I'm learning in my GOVT class is that the best way to change something you don't like about the government is to run for office. To run for the House of Representatives you must meet three requirements...and to important side bars that really help:

1-Be 25 years old
2-Be a United States citizen for 7years
3-Live in the district you wish to represent

The two side bars being:

1-Have a good deal of money
2-Somehow out think your opponents

I'm not a very smart man, but I have grass root beliefs. I'll be 25 next year, 2months before the election would be held. My only issues would be the 2side bars. The Representative now that I would be challenging has been where he is for the better half of the last decade. I have no money to begin my campaign and I have no political experience.

So if anyone has any idea's please let me know. I'm open for suggestions at this time.

Can We trust the Government?

In my federal government class we had to write a paper over a topic, ^ that's the one I picked. My teacher is the top judge for the county that my college is located in. Here's my paper:

If ever there was a loaded question I’ve answered, this one would take the cake. It’s not the level of trust I have in the United States government, it’s who I trust in the government that’s the issue. I’ve followed the orders’ of my Commander and Chief for the past five years without question. I believe my senators and representatives have my best interests at heart (as long as I petition and vote). I may not agree with everything that’s passed in the legislatures, but if it’s a law passed I obey it because I’m a good citizen. It’s not whether or not we trust the government, it’s an issue of to what degree do we trust the government, and what branches we choose to place our trust in.

There are systems of government involved with every aspect of our lives; our schools have governments, the towns we live in, the state we call home and the country we live in. Without a government to control the meaningless things we take for granted we’d live in chaos and darkness. Through our daily actions we unknowingly rely on different departments and branches of the government to keep our little lives in order.

Having been a government employee, voluntarily that is, I understand a little more than others what our government is capable of. I’ve seen the underdog in a local village rise to control that village with US backing. I’ve watched grown men fall to their knees in fear of what government officials can do to them with the stroke of a pen. I have learned that although we may not see the big picture, the people we’ve put in office are trying to look out for their own interests…the people that put them there. I have faith in those leading our country; they have to protect the rights of those that elected them. Who I do not have any faith in is the Department of Veterans Affairs.

Through out my time in the US Army I was always told, “Keep every scrap of paper given to you if it has your name on it,” or, “Make a copy of everything you have, never give anyone the original.”The number of times I’ve submitted paperwork to the VA has left me at a point that I have no faith in them anymore. A branch set up by the President Herbert Hoover[i] was designed to care for the nation’s veterans of previous wars. Since then the VA has helped countless vets buy houses, claim service related disabilities and get college educations. Recently they have fallen short in their duties to those they serve. Some 16,000 employees are trying to process 290,000 [ii] claims under the Post 9/11 GI Bill. Our country’s government has failed her finest citizens, her fighting men and women.

This past year has been a big year for service members ending their service. The government promised those of us that qualified education benefits. The lack of fore sight of those governmental officials is disgusting. That lack of fore sight leaves many of my brethren and me in a very hot seat; most of us have to “rob Peter to pay Paul” so to speak. Most of the vets I know have their school hours paid for, but it’s an issue of living expenses and allowances that were promised as a package deal to us that are causing problems. Many propose questions of, “How do I pay?” or, “What didn’t I do right?” Most realize that due to the shear amount of claims and the minimal amount of people processing those claims, some will be “lost in the mail” or buried under bureaucratic excuses. Although this is frustrating, it is a common problem. Common human error, misplaced paperwork, understaffed an over worked government offices have put a serious dent in my trust of the government’s appointed branches and their branch heads.

In conclusion, it’s hard to say that I don’t trust the Government of the United States, because our government does most things correctly. It provides protection for her citizens, guarantees our liberties, and provides the utilities we need on a day to day basis. I like most citizens forget these “little things” until they aren’t there anymore. I do trust the officials that I helped elect to keep my best interests in mind. I’m just not sure that they always go about those things in the best way.

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[i] Created July 21, 1930 when Pres. Herbert Hoover signed Executive Order 5398

[ii] Associated Press reports that of the 290,000 claims, about 25,000 are in processing at this time